Wednesday, March 14, 2012

The unexamined life...

"The unexamined life is not worth living." - Socrates

I would have to agree, and venture to add that the "living" you do in the midst of an unexamined life, is not truly living at all.

I have been unplugged from the Matrix for quite some time. Not in the revolutionary, "emancipate your self from mental slavery" sense, but in the - this is all just too much, I'd rather not, sense. I've stopped writing/journaling, I've stopped praying, I've stopped going to church, I've stopped keeping up with the blogosphere. Anything that could potentially serve as an outlet for self-reflection...I've disconnected from.

And I've done this before. I've been here before. But in a way that I felt, knew, acknowledged that something was wrong and I was unbelievably sad. Now, I'm just unbelievably numb, and feel like I've accepted that this is just the way it is. Which scares me a bit - to be on auto-pilot, "living" my life, but not living it at all.

So, this is step one in trying to shake that fog. My 33rd birthday is in 10 days! I'm planning a spa vacation with two of my favorite people, and I am genuinely excited about the change of scenery (and the spa, of course!)

And I plan to start connecting again - I'm praying for guidance and direction.

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