Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Her Hair Story

The thing about this journey - as I've seen is true in my self and others around the web - is that it almost always starts out being just about hair...but that's never where it ends.

For me it started as random agreement with a friend in my early 20s...that we were gonna be loc'd by 30 and would start growing out our hair about a year or so before. As I sit here at 31, one month natural after a 13 month transition, obviously I'm a little behind schedule. However, as I've come to realize, it's all about the journey - not so much the destination or the time it takes to get there.

In April 2009 I unintentionally got my last relaxer. Five months later after stretching my perm through a hot and humid NYC summer with braids, I decided to purposefully see where this road would take me.

I was scared to BC, so I grew my hair out for 13 months, gradually trimming the ends, until I was ready to let go!

I've learned so much about myself and about my hair in this process. I got really creative during my transition and tried lots of styles and products thanks to all of the wonderfully supportive and informative ladies on youtube, fotki, and the hair blogs!

This journey has taken me on a path that involves a greater appreciation of myself – holistically. It has helped me toward acceptance of the “ME” that God has created me to be – and to hear so many others acknowledging the same is truly motivational. God made no mistakes when creating me – he didn’t mean to give me bone straight hair…then forgot. Embracing that thought has helped me to be better to myself – mind, body, and soul – and has allowed me to honor His perfect plan in the creation of me on several levels. I have found myself more conscious of not just what I put into my hair, but also about what I put into my body and what I allow into my mind.

I am embracing a new concept of beauty – and it’s a struggle. I still see sisters with long straight hair and miss those years at the Dominican salon, while on the other hand I see sisters with fierce fro’s and luscious loc’s and get hair envy. I am, as we all are, a work in progress. But I see and appreciate the infinite possibilities of what our hair can be – and beyond that how the state of our hair impacts our consciousness.

We may or may not BE our hair, but we are integrally connected to our hair and it affects the “YOU” that shines through. I have noticed, in myself and others, a new confidence that comes with the change. I have found myself absolutely loving the “new” stuff that’s growing out of my head, whereas in my permed days I used to run to my stylist’s chair at the first sign of waves preventing my hair from laying flat to my scalp.

It’s like a mandatory gift that comes with the decision to transition – “to rock this look, you must have the self-confidence to go with it”. For some, I’m sure, it’s just a mechanism for coping with the nay-sayers and curious looks from less than supportive people. But as you grow into, and begin to walk in that self confidence – it presents itself as a regal beauty and an exuded sense of being totally comfortable with the skin you’re in.

So as I enter this 2nd month of my naturalness I have come to absolutely love the change in me – and I am happy to share a little bit of that with any of you who choose to join me along the way.

Peace & Blessing…


  1. Everything you said is so true. I am currently transitioning and I have to constantly deal my hubby giving my hair the sideye and my mom commenting that she prefers it straight. Years ago, I would have caved. Today, I stand my ground.

    P.S. Thanks for following my blog.

  2. Thanks for following back Latoya!

    My biggest critics have been the teens in my family. To them Straight is pretty and normal...Natural, not so much.

    I'm slowly changing their minds as I style, and I actually gotten a few - oh you hair looks cute.

    And as you said in your post that I love - they will still love you, and they will love your hair because they love you.

    Mom & Hubby will come around :o)